Sunday, August 22, 2010

Special!? Fuck That!

You aren't special. Neither are your fucking kids. Your pets are pretty average too. I am not saying this JUST because I hate you. Though if you believe in words like special then I do hate you. In fact go fuck yourself.

Special doesn't exist. Neither does unique or "the best". Everything you have ever thought or done has been done before. If you invented some new product or gadget, someone else thought of it first. They just didn't have the ability to make it or fully comprehend it.

You fucknuggets out there like to use these imaginary terms, like special, to make things more important then they really are. You use them to describe anything and everything. A 3 year old reads at a college level and they are special. Yet a 20 year old with autism can color inside the lines and they are fucking special too? That is too opposite of definitions for one word. Come to think of it fuck "aloha" too. Fucking Hawaiians have 800 words for fish and yet hello and goodbye have to share the same word. Suck my tropical flavored ballsack! And fuck the Eskimos for having 6000 different words for snow. That has nothing to do with this post i just find that amazingly irritating.

Unique is a bullshit term too. The more you separate yourself, the more animosity you create.  Everyone is different and yet everyone is the same. You are all good at some things, shitty at others and overall just like everyone else.

I absolutely hate when I am talking to someone new and they inevitably say something like, "the thing you gotta know about me is..." Its at this point I black out of the conversation and hopefully when I return to my senses they are either done with their self indulgent soliloquy OR have walked away when they realize I am not paying attention. If I were to listen to that shit I would have to fight the urge to grab them and scream, "Listen you cockmonkey, I don't give a shit about you yet. If we are gonna end up friends, these are all things that I will or will not discover in time. I don't need your ego-laden drivel infecting my already low opinion of you." And it's even worse if I have known you for a long time. I know by now what you are like. I don't need any more reminders of why you are an obnoxious human being I see it all the fucking time.

The best is worst term of them all. There is no best. Something better is always around the corner. So how about you just be happy with what you fucking have. Or you know what? Go ahead kill yourself looking for the best in life. They call that being a consumer.

So once again, you aren't special. You aren't unique. And the best will never get here. So just shut the fuck up. Take a deep breath. Smile and be happy, you delusional fuck.

Of course if you agree with me on this point already, then thank you for your support. Now fuck off you are bothering me.

With deep and abiding affection,

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